Review: Perfect Strangers (Perfetti sconosciuti)

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Last weekend was a bad movie weekend. First “Don’t breathe” which is a cheap thrill scary movie and then as a part of my “refresh and perfect Italian” Perfect Strangers. The latter film is rather weak and I wouldn’t recommend you, Dear Rinser, watching it. However, similarly like in a recent review by #englishrosiee of Maggie’s Plan here I’ll focus on some issues addressed in the movie that are worth considering.

“Perfect Strangers” is a story of a bunch of Italian friends meeting up for supper. One couple just started trying for a baby. Another one deals with their teenage daughter growing pains. Third one seems to  be estranged but still keeping up appearances. The last guest is a man who arrives yet again without his mysterious partner whom no one has met. One of the first conversation topics is a friend in common who left his wife for a younger woman and is judged harshly by the present. The host is convinced that everyone has dirty secrets and she suggests they play a game in which they put their phones on the table and read whatever messages come through aloud. If someone calls them they’re also supposed to answer at the table without disclosing that they’re taking part in the game. Let’s just say that each and every guest turns out to have something to hide, not to spoil it too much for you if you against your better judgment decide to watch the movie.

The issues brought up by the movie are definitely interesting. I think that our partner should know a lot about us and there’s no point in a dishonest relationship. Infidelity, sexting with strangers and other similar things are just not something I approve of.  I think that it’s disrespectful towards a partner and a relationship and that we should leave one thing first before we start another. The participants of the game are Italians and unfortunately after all I’ve seen living in Italy I think the movie is only a slight exaggeration. I have no stats regarding infidelity in the country and it’s possible that as many people cheat there as in other countries, however cheating is definitely treated in a much lighter way there (particularly in the South). Still, no one tells their partner openly about such things so if such a secret was supposed to surface, it would definitely cause turmoil as it does in the movie.

On the other hand, honesty with one’s partner is one thing and with our friends another. Being a “perfect stranger” with our partner means we’re just not in a good relationship. What does it mean about a friendship, though? How much should we disclose to our friends? Should we or do we have to confide in them if we’re having an affair? A plastic surgery? Do secrets change a friendship and what secrets actually do matter? These are the questions that we have to answer ourselves. Swapping a phone with a partner shouldn’t be a problem but I think most of us would agree that it’s not necessary to do it with a friend too. If it’s so we must ask ourselves about the reason why and what we hide from those we surround ourselves with. I’m not sure whether the times have changed or is secretiveness a human trait but it seems that human relations outside of the main one with a partner operate on a lower or higher level of deceit.

Any thoughts, Dear Rinsers?

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4 comments

  1. juliakaylin · January 18

    Hey!
    I enjoyed reading your post! I look foward to reading more! Good luck and happy new year!

    Like

  2. bklynboy59 · January 18

    It’s never good to keep secrets in a relationship especially if someone in the relationship is having an affair. That said not everything has to be full disclosure to our friends either. How you handle your finances is private how you have sex is private there are some conversations that you two have about even your friends are private.Does your friends know what kind of noise you make when you make love? Of course not that is private and show stay that way. There is somethings yes that others may need to know but full disclosure on everything all the time …???? No

    Liked by 1 person

    • zlotybaby · January 18

      Sure. Even with a partner we may prefer for him or her not to know how we sound when we have a diarrhea, to give a crude example. I consider details of sex live with a partner private and wouldn’t discuss them with a friend but I wish people were a bit more open about money with their friends.

      Like

  3. EnglishRosiee · January 18

    The phone game seems like an interesting concept !

    Of course friends don’t need to know everything. But telling a friend too much could be seen as selfish – if you tell them about your affair how are they supposed to act when they meet the person you are cheating on? They only see one side of the story and are expected to carry on as normal.

    I think we need to be selective about what we tell our friends and our motives for doing so. Maybe we want their approval to legitimize our bad behaviour or we think a problem shared is a problem halved (or more like they take half the bad karma!).

    Liked by 1 person

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