Where do broken hearts go?

image

Watching “Titanic” (about which you’ll read tomorrow) and reading #englishrosiee’s story in the Guardian made me think of two things. Namely, cheesy love songs and broken hearts. Let me try to reply to the question asked in Whitney Houston’s love song “Where do broken hearts go?” in today’s post.

Having a broken heart is seemingly not a big thing. When we fall in love for the first time we think that our partner is perfect and that our lives will end if the relationship finishes. At a young age we’re often emotionally immature and we’re more concerned about partners liking and loving us than about our own feelings towards them. We often don’t know what we want and we’re just not ready to form a proper partnership with someone. The puppy love clinginess of our early youth is just a stage.

We often have our hearts broken more than once before we meet a person with whom we truly want to share a life. I don’t think we love more at a young age but I have an impression that we love more dramatically, partially because we lack perspective. With age we get more and more reasonable. Rejection always hurts but at least we know the pain will end eventually and we’re not going to be forever alone.

The experience of a broken heart becomes better known and therefore it should be easier to deal with. Especially when you meet the next person that you care about you tend to forget about the pain inflicted by the former partner. The happier you are the less you think about past failures and the more you see how they were necessary to bring you to the point in life when you can share your general happiness with a partner. It’s all good as long as you learn.

Having said that, even when we reach the point of general oblivion about what used to be sometimes something reminds us about a person that broke our heart in the past and the pain of the memory, even if short, is real. Be it bumping into a person on the street, hearing about their new partner or simply having an object or a place reminding of a former longtime crush, fling or partner and one feels the sting that fortunately is quickly forgotten in the everyday routine.

Where do broken hearts go? I don’t think they go anywhere. A broken heart heals and becomes but a scar on your normal heart. As you nourish love for life and someone else the scar gets so very small that sometimes you feel that this injury is gone along with all other fractures, bruises and scrapes. There’s nothing wrong with being reminded from time to time that life hasn’t always been sweet to us because by acknowledging past pains we understand ourselves better and we appreciate more what we have now.

So, Dear Rinsers, where do you think broken hearts go according to you? And more importantly do you know the song? 😉

Advertisements

7 comments

  1. EnglishRosiee · March 29, 2016

    Whitney Houston is a silly fool ! If you think over the lyrics of this song – you’ll see she is actually just despo to get this ex back into her life even though he supposedly broke her heart. She is not really asking – where do broken hearts go? She is asking how do I work my way back into the arms of the fool who hurt me!!! So she isn’t looking to heal her broken heart or send it to the place of other broken hearts instead she is looking for a boomerang relationship.

    As I said in my that post, nothing good comes from nostalgically looking back on past relationships. Believe me its an easy trap to fall into especially with the alternative options out their looking so bleak – it often becomes a case of the ex that broke your heart vs. a long line of mind-numbing convos with unfortunate looking men. BUT if that broken heart is to ‘go’ anywhere you eventually need to let go.

    I agree with you. There is no dumping ground for broken hearts. Sadly, they stay with you although they may become a little less broken if you work on it. But what is the alternative…the fact that you have a broken heart/hearts means you’ve been in love/ had some life experience and I’ll always advocate that over being a sad spinster 😛

    Liked by 1 person

  2. bklynboy59 · March 30, 2016

    Do I know the song???? LOL seriously???A Young Whitney Houston before the drugs ruined a wonderful voice I bought that album when it came out. As for the topic …Where do broken hearts go? that depends on how you bounce back from it. Some like you mention find another love and bounce back nicely and others don’t bounce back at all and become bitter at everything and everybody.

    Liked by 1 person

    • zlotybaby · March 30, 2016

      You’re back! We thought you forgot about us! I also know this song since I was a kid. I think it depends a lot on a person but one should grow from negative experiences rather than dwell on them.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Pingback: Therapy – ‘Professional’ Help for ‘Relationship’ Issues (or Lack Thereof) | rinse before use
  4. Plectrumm · April 11, 2016

    Memories of all sorts become less sticky with time and lack of attention? Reliving them feeds them, subsequently they grow and transform with such nurturing.

    Like

  5. Pingback: How to Give Love Advice – a Philosophical Divagation | rinse before use

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s