Watching “Titanic” (about which you’ll read tomorrow) and reading #englishrosiee’s story in the Guardian made me think of two things. Namely, cheesy love songs and broken hearts. Let me try to reply to the question asked in Whitney Houston’s love song “Where do broken hearts go?” in today’s post.
Having a broken heart is seemingly not a big thing. When we fall in love for the first time we think that our partner is perfect and that our lives will end if the relationship finishes. At a young age we’re often emotionally immature and we’re more concerned about partners liking and loving us than about our own feelings towards them. We often don’t know what we want and we’re just not ready to form a proper partnership with someone. The puppy love clinginess of our early youth is just a stage.
We often have our hearts broken more than once before we meet a person with whom we truly want to share a life. I don’t think we love more at a young age but I have an impression that we love more dramatically, partially because we lack perspective. With age we get more and more reasonable. Rejection always hurts but at least we know the pain will end eventually and we’re not going to be forever alone.
The experience of a broken heart becomes better known and therefore it should be easier to deal with. Especially when you meet the next person that you care about you tend to forget about the pain inflicted by the former partner. The happier you are the less you think about past failures and the more you see how they were necessary to bring you to the point in life when you can share your general happiness with a partner. It’s all good as long as you learn.
Having said that, even when we reach the point of general oblivion about what used to be sometimes something reminds us about a person that broke our heart in the past and the pain of the memory, even if short, is real. Be it bumping into a person on the street, hearing about their new partner or simply having an object or a place reminding of a former longtime crush, fling or partner and one feels the sting that fortunately is quickly forgotten in the everyday routine.
Where do broken hearts go? I don’t think they go anywhere. A broken heart heals and becomes but a scar on your normal heart. As you nourish love for life and someone else the scar gets so very small that sometimes you feel that this injury is gone along with all other fractures, bruises and scrapes. There’s nothing wrong with being reminded from time to time that life hasn’t always been sweet to us because by acknowledging past pains we understand ourselves better and we appreciate more what we have now.
So, Dear Rinsers, where do you think broken hearts go according to you? And more importantly do you know the song? 😉