I recently learnt that this idea of love being blind dates back to Shakespearean times. I guess, being physically attractive mattered less back in those days when life was simpler, MAC make-up didn’t exist and your folks decided who you’d marry. Theoretically I agree that love should be blind. Why should it matter if someone has a pretty face or great fashion sense…after all good looks fade with time and at the end of the day we are all going to end up as a bag of bones regardless? However, I think if we are honest with ourselves, we realise that appearances matter more these days than we’d like to admit.
Swiping for a Soulmate
As part of the smartphone generation, we use Tinder to help us in our quest for love. I’m out and proud about my use of this app, unlike the majority who are embarrassed to admit they are on Tinder (they don’t want their highbrow friends to know that they looking for a hook-up with a HOTTIE half their age).
But does swiping left or right based on a single picture of a person (let us admit we rarely read the profile before we actually match with them) make us really superficial? To some extent yes, but how is it any different from real life? It’s not like we run up to every ugly troll on the street and strike up a conversation in the hope that they could possibly be ‘the one’. On the other hand, isn’t it scary to think we could swipe left and lose out the chance to meet our soul mate just because the photo was taken at a bad angle ?
While allowing your friend to play Cilla Black and set you up on a blind date might seem like a more traditional form of dating, remember times have changed and nothing has to be ‘blind’ anymore.
Take for instance, the occasion where you agree to a blind date because you kinda owe a friend a favour but you strategically used the one piece of information that the matchmaker has disclosed (the guy’s rather unique name) to perform a Facebook stalking exercise which confirms he isn’t your type. Still a deal’s a deal, so you maintain faith in the matchmaker, and go through with the date. But in the end, despite some good conversation (and free flowing booze), Facebook didn’t lie and there really is no attraction, proving once again that appearances really do matter.
DISCLAIMER: I am being honest so don’t hate me for this one.
So, you’ve been chatting to a guy on OKC for a while, he seems (and looks) nice enough but when you meet…you notice he has some severe facial disfigurement. It seems he strategically managed to hide this in his profile photos. Technically, there is nothing wrong with that (because it’s the same difference as having straightened hair in a picture and then breaking some dudes spirit by pitching with your naturally curly locks – true story). But all you feel is sorry for this guy, and spend the whole date wondering what happened to him.
When he asks you out again part of you feel obliged to go out of sympathy but you realise nothing meaningful can come from feeling sorry for a person, so you rope in a trusty male friend of yours to help you write a WhatsApp (basically saying you are not in a good space for anything romantic – white lie) to let him down gently.
Ok dear readers…how important do you think looks are in the 21st century dating game? Do you think we’ve become so obsessed with appearances that we overlook some really great (slightly less good looking) people? And finally, should you ever date someone out of sympathy?